Elizabeth Misses Again

24HourCoffeePeople is a bustling coffee shop on the outskirts of London: this blog shares moments where caffeine isn’t the main event but the people who visit or work there really are.

Just before Christmas, Elizabeth’s brother was down in the dumps. As Warren, Elizabeth’s husband, was preparing a new family nest in Hong Kong thanks to a promotion at work, Elizabeth suggested her brother, Ian, go out there and join him for a week. She felt it would do them both good. If you ask Mad Susan to describe Warren, she says, ‘pussy’ – not as in cat, but as in puss-filled. When Elizabeth’s sombre brother arrived at the airport, he was met by Warren weilding a bag of condoms, some lubricant and a full packet of Viagra. ‘What happens in Hong Kong stays in Hong Kong’, he warned Ian, obviously having watched a movie too many. Slightly bewildered, Ian accompanied Warren on what can only be described as a hard-fest through Hong Kong’s red light district, only to be even more aghast that Warren is clearly a regular as the girls were calling him by name to have some fun.

Naturally, on Ian’s return, he tells all to Elizabeth. She enlists Mad Susan, who in turn tears Warren’s character to shreds while bolstering Elizabeth’s shattered ego. ‘You can do so much better,’ she said. And, indeed she could. As one of life’s pleasers, Elizabeth is never happier than when making someone else happy. When I bumped into Mad Susan in the understaffed pet shop, she told me Elizabeth had gone out to Hong Kong to join Warren, having forgiven him and looking forward to redecorating the new nest. I didn’t know there were women like that any more. Mad Susan’s take is, ‘I’d rather have dogs for company and if Feargal slept with a prostitute, I’d have to blind him.’  It’s a shame that Elizabeth has gone; but at least we know where she is, which is more than we can say for Able.


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